I NEED Your Support... To Be Healthy

We've all seen the show. Some Most of us are inspired by it. We see these average, over weight people go on The Biggest Loser and miraculously transform into healthier people. Even the people who only went there for a week, are "suddenly" changed. This is all a lie. To me at least.

This is not going to be easy. I'm already hyperventilating as I'm typing this post. It's not the fact that I have to loose weight. Or to accept the fact that I'm fat. Yes, fat. The part that is hard to digest is writing this for anyone to see. Family, friends, random strangers, people who Google me, are all going to see this. That is the hard part.

 Let me move on. I've ALWAYS most of my life, been fat. From birth-5 years old I was healthy. Then I had really bad ear infections and lost 80% of my hearing. I had surgery to put tubes in, my tonsils and adenoids out. My hearing got better but after that I gained weight and never lost it. In fact I kept gaining, and gaining, and gaining.

I'm on the right, 3 years old

I've always been active. Played softball, basketball and dance until high school. In high school I did track, tennis, band, and ran a 1/2 marathon. But I've always been overweight and it kept me from a lot of things. I never had a lot of dates, wasn't part of the "popular" crowd, didn't do the typical high school things. It made prom dress shopping miserable. It made my senior trip not fun because I was embarrassed to be in a bathing suit. It held me back.

Senior Picture 2006

Senior Prom, 2007

Then I went to college. That was even worse. I tried for a sorority but no one wants the fat girl. Especially when you go to a Big 10 school full of beautiful people. I had a hard time making a lot of friends. I wasn't confident to go out so I spent most of the nights in my dorm room instead of going out with the other girls on my floor. You learn to self-cope. You learn to be the "fat friend" who will be by your side no matter what. You learn to take head-shots instead of full-body shots. You learn to ignore the sales girls who won't come near you because you both know you won't fit in any of the clothes in the store. You learn to be the wing-woman with guys because every girl things a guy out with a "fat friend" is sympathetic and charming. You learn to be someone who you don't want to be and put a smile on your face so everyone knows its ok.

Freshman year, Fall 2007

Sophomore year, Fall 2007

Well I can't do it any longer. I don't want to spend any more nights alone and not having fun because of my weight. I don't want the sympathetic stares, I want the "dang she's cute" stares. I don't want to only take head-shots I want full-body, full of life and adventure shots. I don't want to be the wing-woman I want to have the boyfriend/husband that everyone is jealous of. I want to be healthy, fit, and free from this burden. But most importantly, I want to be me.

Senior year, 2011

Summer, 2011

 So I'm taking the steps to do this. I've joined a gym I really like. I'm trying clean eating and loving it. I'm doing all the steps I can. What I don't have is support. No one in my life really struggles with their weight. I don't have friends who truly understand. My family doesn't understand. My colleagues don't understand. When I say I really shouldn't have something, I mean it. But I don't want to be the person who lets people down, so I go. I NEED support. I NEED to loose this weight.

Fall, 2011

 Will you support me? Any is better than none.

5 For Five 2013: Week 4

Happy Monday! It's a long one for me so I'll be glad when its over! Until then enjoy this 5 for Five post!

 Success, Fail, Part of the way

 1) Keep Tracking On Myfitnesspal: I did this the 5 days I ate clean but this weekend I just didn't want to worry about it and that's ok with me.
 
2) Try Clean Eating 5 Days this week

3) Workout at least 3 days this week

4) Study the Bible Everyday

5) Meet at least 1 new person: While I didn't do this IRL (In real Life) I met new blog friends and got closer to the ones I have :)

Goals for this week!

1) Continue Clean Eating! I'm loving this because it's easy to follow, and it made me feel SO GOOD last week! 

2) Go to the gym 4 days this week! I did this last week. I can do it this week too!

3) Listen to new artists: Ok this may seem a little weird but I get "stuck" in my music. I listen to the same things over and over because I love them. I want to love new music so let me know who you listen to!

4) Continue tracking on MFP: This seriously is one of the best apps. I love, love, love it. Join and we can be friends!

5) Be Positive! This week is going to be hard. Especially Monday & Tuesday. I'll share more on Wednesday. But through it all I need to be positive for my friends, students, colleagues, and most importantly myself. 

What are your goals? Make sure to share some music love!

Sunday Social

Lately Linking-Up has been my jam. I don't know what it is, maybe because they are safe. Maybe because they tend to get me new followers... or maybe it's just because I like the idea behind them. Whichever way you slice it though, I will be linking-up with Neely & Ashley for Sunday Social purely for the fact that it is fun.

What is your ideal way to relax: A cup of hot tea/chocolate or glass of wine and catching up on my favorite shows on a Friday night.

Who do you consider your biggest role model: Definitely my Mom. She has been through so much and has handled it with grace and has always put me before her.

 What does your life look like in 3 years? HOPEFULLY married or in a very serious relationship, still teaching & loving it, and possibly owning a home.

If you could go back and change one decision what would it be? To be healthier as a kid and enjoy life more in high school and college. I also wish I would have made & kept better/more friends.

What is your biggest accomplishment in life thus far? Easily graduating from Michigan State University with my B.A in Special Education & moving to Las Vegas and having a full time job that I truly love.

Weekly What?!

Guess What! Saturday's almost over... boo. BUT the GREAT thing about Saturday is this new link-up called the Weekly What!

To find out more about why this was created visit here. Also, I'm using Jenn's headings because she did an awesome job on them and I like the look :)

 On Monday I linked-up with Jenn for 5 for Five! I love this link-up because it FORCES encourages me to list my goals for the week and (hopefully) achieve them. It's also a great support system of fellow bloggers!

Love to hear the crazy things kids do & say? Then look no further because I have some funny Tales from A Teacher post :) I promise you will laugh at least once, unless you are the Grinch or Mr. Scrooge.

Thursday was an "Its Ok" day. Want to find out what is Ok in my life? Check this out! It may or may not include some annoyances and Trader Joes ;)

Friday Letters is where its at! These are some simple letters that sum up my ups, downs and pictures of food. Plus anything that starts with Dear... in my book is A+!

Friday's Letters

Today I'm in a letter writing mood... maybe it's because my students are also working on letters or maybe it's because I just love writing letters. Thankfully, Ashley also likes writing letters!

 Dear Friday, you didn't take long to get here but it's been the worst week and I'm glad it's over. Dear Students, please come to school on Monday with a much better attitude towards school! Dear Koko Fit Club, I love you. Truly, the best gym. Dear Clean Eating, I'm sticking with ya and I feel your effects! Dear Metro Pizza, I'm going to enjoy every last bite tonight! Dear Las Vegas, Thank you for the beautiful sunrises this week, the perfect "spring" weather & not being 0 degrees like Michigan. Dear Readers, Thank you for being awesome and commenting! I love them!

 If you are anything like me, the week gets very busy and time to read up on everyone's blog goes out the window. Then, on Saturday & Sunday you're trying to catch up so you don't have time to comment. Right?! Well, My FRIEND Jenn & some peeps have come up with the best solution. I'm going to use Jenn's description because it's the best.

"Allie had the genius idea for the concept of a "Weekly What" post that allows you, the awesome blogger you are, to put together a post that recaps all of your posts from earlier in the week! That way, when someone comes to your blog, say me, on Saturday morning to do some catch up reading- they can sit down and find EVERYTHING you had to say (links and all) right in ONE place. "

So you all should link-up and share your post. It'll be fun & meet new friends! Plus you could win $30!! Do IT :)

"Its Ok" Thursday

It's been a hot while since I've linked-up with Amber & Neely for "Its Ok" Thursday but I've missed it and figure why not :)

"Its Ok"

•  To absolutely dread getting the afternoon snoozes. It hits me almost every day like clockwork around 1 pm. It's right before I start my reading period and I still have another 3 hours of work and 8 hours till bed...
• To actually enjoy my Clean Eating Lifestyle so far! Granted, it's only been 3 whole days but I'm finding it really easy to stick with.
• To be proud I've gone to the gym 3 days in a row at 5am. I'm getting my stuff together ;)
• To be completely annoyed with Sponsor posts. There I said it. They are great but does everyone get together and say "let's ambush the readers with all the sponsor posts in 1 week!". Please, I want to hear from you!
• To be a bit jealous I can't afford a sponsorship and thus have very few readers. It's a vicious cycle.
• To be sad that Private Practice is over
• To be completely in love with my new Magic Bullet and obsessing over recipes and all the fun things it can do.
• To be in love with Trader Joes and wander around there for hours and only spend $5 on a salad.
• That I enjoy spending time on Wednesday night with my Bible Study girls. No school, no work, no cell phone. Just God & Friends.
• That as an adult I love 3 day weekends, but as a teacher I hate them. They throw off my student's schedule all week & mine. 
• That it's ALMOST FRIDAY!!! Shout for Joy!

 What's Ok in your life?

Tales From A Teacher

It's Tuesday. I've decided I'm waking up with a positive attitude and going to embrace the day. That being said, being a teacher is not easy. Sure we get summers "off" and long, holiday breaks BUT our hours at home are often spent grading papers, making lesson plans, and worrying about our students.

That being said... I've only been away from my students for 3 days and I'm ready to go back and see them. Yep, I'm THAT teacher. The one who cares about the little one's health, whether they are getting enough love at home, and about the parent's relationship. It is my students who make my job so wonderful and have me looking forward to the day. I know not all of you are so lucky to have such a wonderful job filled with laughter and smiles so I though I'd share a few funny stories :)
 (All names have been changed).

1) Angelique: Ms. Hattan, why do you always wear sunglasses?
    Me: Well, it's Las Vegas, it's sunny ALL THE TIME.
    Angelique: Oh, then why do you wear a scarf, coat & pants?
    Me: Lately it's been cold and I don't want to freeze.
    Angelique: Dang it, Sarah's right. (shouts across the room) SARAH! You're right, Ms. Hattan isn't   a vampire!
    * As I'm cracking up writing this the funniest part is A was completely serious! I guess she's been watching a bit too much Twilight...

2) Brad is one of my favorite students. He wasn't always. In fact at the beginning of the year we mutually hated each other. But now we are extremely close and there's been so much progress with him. Unfortunately he got in trouble and had to have in-school suspension. We have a notebook where we write notes to each other and here's his entry from his suspension day.

"Ms. Hattan, I'm really, really, really sorry! I won't do it again!"
"Ms. Hattan, I'm BORED please come rescue me!"
"Mrs. V (suspension teacher) teaches like you... maybe I'll just join her class"
"FINE Hate Me, I HATE YOU!"
"You're so mean. I hear you talking. I know you want me to come back."
"Ok. fine. you win. I'll be good."
"Whoo the day is almost over. I think. I'm going to kidnapp Llama Llama!"

*Needless to say I think he went through some of the stages of grief. And Llama Llama is safe.

3) As a read-aloud I have been reading NERDS to my students. In short it's a series of books about 6th grade nerds who are really spies for the agency NERDS and they save the world. One of the characters is Ms. Holiday who is the librarian.

My friend Christine has this amazing idea for our writing time I put on a pair of fake glasses and no one can bother me while I have these glasses on. It's my time to work with a student one-on-one. It works brilliantly. My students call me Ms. Holiday and she comes to life being a super nerd who loves writing and the English Language.

Well, on Friday I needed a moment to myself. I couldn't find my fake glasses so I put on my hot pink sunglasses. One of my students came up to me and asked what I was doing. I replied, "Ms. Hattan isn't here right now. I'm Diva. I need a minute" The student thought this was the best thing in the world! She went and got her autograph notebook and asked me to sign it. Then she was my body guard. Then ALL the students wanted Diva's autograph. Needless to say the plan backfired but I know I can bust out my other personalities Ms. Holiday & Diva and they have my back :)

That's all for today and I hope you enjoyed!

Have any funny kid/student stories? SHARE!

Five for 5 2013: Week 3

Happy Monday! It really is a happy Monday for me because I have the day off! I have today off because it is MLK day. Please take a moment of thought for how many wonderful things this man did for us.

Continuing on...

 Jenn & Jess are so amazing to host this link-up every week and I'm happy to announce that I rocked it! Green=Success!

1) Track my food on Myfitnesspal every day this week

2) Keep Up on Housework & Laundry!  

3) No Eating Past 8 pm

4) Comment on More Blogs

5) Be Thankful & Happy   

 A lot of these were able to be success because I've been really, really sick the past 2 days. Yesterday I finally went to the doctor and was diagnosed with the flu and bronchitis. Thankfully, due to modern medicine, I'm feeling much, much better!

Here are my goals for the week!

1) Keep Tracking On Myfitnesspal! I really like how this is so easy to use and I feel that it helps me with my accountability.

2) Try Clean Eating 5 Days this week: I just finished Tosca Reno's "Eat-Clean Diet Recharged" and it has inspired me! I do a lot of things already so I'm thinking that sticking to it 5 days won't be too difficult.

3) Workout at least 3 days this week: Now that I'm finally feeling a little bit normal I want to make it to the gym at least 3 days. Even if I only do the treadmill, it's at least something.

4) Study the Bible Everyday: I already do this every night (Thanks Bible App!) but I really want to get into HIS word and apply to every day life.

5) Meet at least 1 new person: This may sound easy but it's very difficult for me to do. I'm not one to go to parties, or out just because. However, this is one of my New Years Goals and there's not better time than the present.

Link-Up and share what your 5 goals are!
 

Sunday Social 3 Theme

Happy Sunday Friends! It's been a beat and a half since I've linked up with Neely & Ashley for Sunday Social but since I'm down & out (the flu & bronchitis have gotten to me!) I thought I'd join in the fun :)

 This week it's all about 3s

Top 3 Favorite Kinds of Food: Anything breakfast (except scrambled eggs...ick!), Italian & Mexican.

First 3 Things you do in the morning: Hit the snooze button, check social media (email, facebook, twitter), & start the coffee.

Last 3 Things you do at night: Watch a show on Netflix or Hulu, read & bible devotional.

3 TV shows you NEVER miss: Since I don't have a T.V I miss my favorite shows until they become available on Hulu but I always watch Once Upon A Time, Revenge, & The Mindy Project.

3 Places you want to visit: Australia, England/London, & Ireland

3 People you can always count on: Mom & Dad, Elizabeth, Christine

P.S Have you ever wondered what it would be like to live in the 1950s and be a housewife? Well the incredible (and slightly insane) Christine has started a new blog all about this subject. It's witty and full of useful knowledge so you should go check it out right now!

Five for 5: 2013, Week 2

So I'm posting this a little late. I'm disappointed in myself. I'm sorry to the reader who left my blog :(

Good news is, I'm posting now and hopefully you all will forgive me ;)

 I really love linking up with Jenn & Jess but this week was an EPIC FAIL!

 Here is a review of my goals last week. Fail & Success

1) Not let school stress me out! I have finally embraced the fact that I cannot change my school's situation right now. I have a job. I love my students. I show up to work with a mostly positive attitude and that is all I can do.

2) Workout! Workout! Workout! Fail, Fail, Fail. I had a lot of late night last week (report cards were due) and it just didn't get done.
 
3) Post about Eat In Month! See above.

4) Write at least 3 notes! This was a success. It was pretty easy since both of my sister's birthdays are on the same day & I had to send out their cards. I also had to send a thank you card out.

5) Stay caught up on laundry & housework! This is a fail because I didn't clean my apartment until last night. But it's done now!

GOALS FOR THIS WEEK!

1) Track my food on Myfitnesspal every day this week! To add me search for ElleHattan. 

2) Keep Up on Housework & Laundry! I can do this, I can do this!

3) No Eating Past 8 pm: According to a close friend this is very important for my weight loss. This will be a little tricky because I love having popcorn or a snack before bed.

4) Comment on More Blogs: I really do read  a ton of blogs. I love everyone of them. But it's hard to comment on my phone. I need to take the time to do it and reach out and meet more people.

5) Be Thankful & Happy: I really am incredibly lucky. I have an excellent family whom mostly support me. Great friends. A job I love (just not the place). And my Faith in God is stronger than ever. I need to remember these things.

What are your goals?
  

5 For Five: 2013, Week 1

Hello!

This post is going to be super short & sweet because it is 11:30 and I'm exhausted! Unfortunately there was a school board meeting tonight and it lasted 4 hours and I left early! Ugh... moving on.

I really adore linking up with Jenn & Jess because they make things so fun and I've found so many fun blogs because of this link-up!

 1) Not let school stress me out! I think this seems to speak for itself but after tonight I have a feeling it might be a little bit of a tougher week than I expected. I need to not bring this stress home!

2) Workout! Workout! Workout! 

3) Post about Eat In Month! This is an awesome challenge I'm doing and am so excited. I really need to put my rules/goals down.

4) Write at least 3 notes! I really love cards and want to return the favor... plus who doesn't love getting some positive snail mail :)

5) Stay caught up on laundry & housework! So other than a few presents & 1 load of laundry I'm all caught up. I'd like it to stay this way because I function way better with an organized house.